Enhancing Family Cohesion across the Childbearing Year

March 3, 2016

Pregnancy confirmed, what next?

When a woman becomes aware she is pregnant, she will likely begin to feel differently about herself, even if only in subtle ways.   Although pregnancy represents a collection of remarkable physical changes capable of supporting the growth and development of another human life, it is perhaps the mental and emotional changes that one first notices and which often follow the discovery of a pregnancy.  Those individuals touched by pregnancy, especially for the first time, can expect to experience a wide range of possible thoughts and emotions.  Such considerations commonly pertain to whether to continue a pregnancy, who to share the news with first and when, how to move forward without a strong support network, financial vitality, how to facilitate family peace (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4610665/),

fears around pregnancy and birth, and concern about one’s ability to parent.  Based upon the fact that individuals faced with the possibility or realization of pregnancy think about a wide variety of things, it is easy to comprehend that the childbearing and parenting journey is part of the human condition and, thus, is colored with many aspects which impact the realms of biology, psychology, and sociology.   

 

The earliest physical changes of the first trimester of three are not typically as noticeable immediately following the news of pregnancy as are changes in the realms of the mind and heart.  On the other hand, of course, there are those women who confirm a physical “shift” at the very initiation of pregnancy, when the sperm and egg successfully combine and implant within a woman’s body.  Getting pregnant, maintaining a healthy pregnancy, going through the birth process, and starting the journey of childrearing are all phases of life which affect our bodies.  As maintaining a healthy body during pregnancy and the postpartum period is vitally important to maternal and infant well-being (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1595006/),

therein lies an opportunity to prioritize physical health in one’s life, possibly for the first time.  As has been evidenced, time and again, pregnant women and babies fare far better physically when adequate and optimal nutrition and exercise are maintained during the childbearing year.  Because of this fact, pregnancy can be a great time to develop or increase healthy habits for both pregnant women and the people they coexist with.  Additionally, this is a wonderful time to enhance bonding between pregnant women and their support people, which might include family and friends.  Although making meals and/or exercising together, for example, can assist all parties in maintaining or increasing physical health and well-being, these activities can also enhance emotional bonding, too.  Lastly, this is a time to consider what elements of pregnancy, childbirth, and the postpartum periods seem to make most personal sense to the individual and, if appropriate, their support network.  Things like pregnancy massage, yoga for pregnancy, enlisting the assistance of a doula, choosing the most suitable birth environment, and/or breastfeeding are all ideas worthy of consideration as part of one’s efforts to increase personal meaning and ownership of one’s experiences during pregnancy and beyond. 

Although women differ in numerous ways, the unique experiences and opportunities that come with traversing the childbearing year can serve to stimulate new understanding about ourselves and deeper connection with others.  Just as a group of diverse pregnant women and/or mothers can learn to offer empathy and support to each other despite their differences, so, too, can the pregnant woman learn to provide empathy and support to herself.  As a previous childbirth educator, doula, and lay midwife, I often encouraged my clients to consider having a mindset that “family begins with me”.  As our individual family experiences and observations of different parenting styles vary greatly, pregnancy can provide an opportunity for us to identify our personal values around what “family” means to us as individuals, how we can develop a sense of family with ourselves and others, and what things appear to be the most meaningful to us as we move through the phases of pregnancy, postpartum, and parenting.  By taking the time to be mindful of and discussing these ideas, then, the pregnant woman, on her own and/or with her support network, can find greater ease in maintaining the greatest level of emotional health and well-being for herself and her baby.  An emotionally healthy pregnancy, inclusive of adequate social support, has also been shown to affect the physical and emotional development of both the unborn and born (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/3092934/).

Certainly, when one considers the personal and/or family milestones inherent in the childbearing year, often what comes to mind first are the obvious challenges associated with this time period.  What one might not consider as readily might be the many opportunities for positive change that can come to pregnant women, their family and friends, and even the communities that surround them.  Due to the fact that pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting are all part of the human condition, these life stages each benefit greatly from the development and improvement of various support networks, coping mechanisms, communication activities, and any other tools supportive of a happy and healthy human existence. 

Enjoy the start of the childbearing year!